The F-Word

The clock struck noon as she awakened, it was an atypical Sunday, now that he was here to share her house and life. The shrill sound of the pressure cooker destroyed the remnants of her sleep, as she rushed in, seeing him finely chopping vegetables.

“What are you doing in the kitchen?!” she questioned. 

He eyed her in amusement, “Babe I’m pretty sure you know what cooking is,” he laughed.

“Why are you cooking? Get out, I’ll do it!” 

“You know that I can cook right? Relax, what’s the matter?” 

She remembered her home, her father belching loudly while her mother served him food, not eating a morsel until he finished. She was strictly instructed to ensure that the men shouldn’t have to enter the kitchen for anything when she was at home, even a glass of water. 

“You okay?” 

She smiled and hugged him from behind, “Better than okay.”

-X-

“What a lovely couple these two will make!” she exclaimed, as the blushing pair stole glances at each other.  

“Although… It’s a great thing that our daughter-in-law works, but don’t you think it will be difficult to manage when she has kids?”

My daughter looked at me in confusion, she was lost for words. 

“Aunty, I’m sure I can manage both, even Sid will be helping me throughout.” 

An uncomfortable silence ensued, as she looked horrified at the thought.

“Child, it isn’t a man’s job to change diapers and all, na? After all, there is nothing a woman needs after motherhood.”

“I’m sorry, but my daughter will not set foot in a house where she is forced to forgo her career. I’m sure Sid knows that times have changed and that my daughter will not sit at home all day long.”

There were tears in her eyes as she faced me, “I love you, dad.”

 -X-

“Folks, please welcome our new CEO, Ms Gupta!”

The office resonated with claps as my coworkers greeted me with enthusiasm. My cabin was bigger than the room I grew up in with my family, and for a second I stood still, overwhelmed. 

Three girls and two boys growing up in a cramped, filthy room. Mummy was the breadwinner and worked multiple jobs at odd hours to fend for our family. We scraped by every day, unsure of what the next one would hold. 

“Why don’t you get the girls married? Then they won’t be your burden to handle. Spend their money on the boys,” the said. 

But mummy refused, being the rebel she was, even in those times. She beat us black and blue if we refused to study, “I’m slogging for you, you will not live the life I lived!” 

Now she stays with the youngest one, making up slowly for all the years she lost. If it wasn’t for her, and all those years of struggle, my name wouldn’t be printed outside my cabin door. People are right, one strong woman raises another strong woman. 

-X-

“Women can open doors ourselves, we don’t need a man’s help ok? Condescending jerks.”

Ignoring his bewildered face, they strode inside. 

“Seriously though, why is it that patriarchy runs through your veins, even in the 21st century?” she accused. 

“I know right? You men can roam around half-naked, showing off your pot-bellies but we cannot do the same,” another one joined in.

“Oh please, like we would have pot-bellies like them,” she smirked. 

“What is with you guys and hating on men?” He asked, scarlet with annoyance. 

“For centuries you all have mistreated women and still do. And you cannot even take some criticism. Feminism is not for everyone!” 

“Do you even know what feminism i-“

“Your bill, please. Will you all be splitting?”

“Oh no, our friend here will be paying for us.”

The bill was placed in front of him, everyone waiting for the payment.

“You’re not going to let us women pay, right?” 

-X-

“Look at Sim’s latest post.” 

The phone circulated the room as everyone observed her post.

“Looks like she shed off her innocence with her clothes as well!” he smirked, inviting glares from others.

“Yeah, as a girl, she shouldn’t be taking such pictures,” Ann chided.

“Why not?” he sniggered. “Let the men also have some fun,” 

“How dare you?!” she burst out. “You leer at her pictures like the pervert you are, what moral ground do you hold? And you, instead of supporting Sim, you’re critical of her life choices?”

“Ah, the righteous one! Is it you or the PMS speaking?” 

She forcibly stopped herself from giving him a slap he wholly deserved.  

“Your toxic mindset just cannot allow you to register the fact that I’m not PMSing every time I speak. But you can roam around shirtless, we can’t show some skin, you cry for attention at the slightest injury, but periods aren’t a big deal, and just because you’re a guy, you speak absolute trash because your life isn’t scrutinized every minute!”

He shifted in his place uncomfortably, “I’m sorry”. But she knew this wouldn’t be his last apology. 

-X-

“You’re going to be late! Hurry!”

“I’m never drinking again on a worknight…”

“We’ll see about that, now don’t forget your lunch!” 

“Have you put in something sweet?”

“Yes, boss.”

“Where’s my bag?”

“One second, I’ll get it from the room.”

A hurried goodbye kiss and a dash for the elevator, bumping into the neighbour. 

“Hi! How are you doing?”

“Not bad, just a tad late for work.”

“Happens to all, haha! Tell me though, when are you inviting us for dinner again? Your spouse’s hands have magic!”

“Come over on Sunday, Raunak loves all the adulation.”

While driving to work, he wished her luck for the deal and reminded her to file for tax returns. He was hosting the weekly society cookout and would be busy preparing. She knew the deal would be sealed, awarding her the promotion she worked months for. He promised to cook her favourite dish as soon as he heard the good news, as he had confidence in her too. 

-X-

It brings the mightiest to their knees and the loudest to a screeching silence. Tread carefully as you speak, for this word cannot be taken lightly. It’s the F-word, Feminism.

There are so many facets to feminism that it is so much more than its dictionary definition. Feminism is an ever-evolving movement, moulding and shaping itself according to the demands of the times we live in; from women fighting for the right to vote, taking up directorial positions in office, tearing off the stereotypes forced onto them, it has grown leaps and bounds since the beginning.

Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t possibly elucidate what feminism stands for. Because for someone feminism means standing up to her family’s backward mentality, for another it means normalizing the expression of female sexuality; the spectrum is broad and the notions are countless. So who is right and who is wrong? The beauty of feminism is that you can take its core principles and weave it according to your wish because all of us come from different backgrounds and lives, it is only natural that our take on feminism may be different from the others’, and different doesn’t mean wrong. However, certain people malign feminism and use it as a tool to bash men, which unfortunately is a prevalent practice in society. I wanted to point out the varying aspects of this concept, which has its beautiful, resilient, angry, spirited, relentless and even toxic side, just like everything else in the world.

If there was one thing I could say in conclusion, it would be that women aren’t solely responsible for carrying the feminist movement forward, men have an equal responsibility to walk alongside in full support. And many times, we pan out to the bigger picture so often that we forget to notice the little things; from calling out sexist people online to having your brother cook dinner to founding a startup, to not hiding the revealing bra strap in embarrassment, feminism is a multitude of things, both big and small, and should be embraced by all.